Glamoween Feed

The 20 Something Years: On Marriage & Halloween

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It's officially that ghoulishly glam time of year and the halls are decked with scaries and glammies. Until today, it didn't feel like I've had any deep, contemplative thoughts to share. Lately, it's been more about staying present, enjoying the now. It's been a long road of growing pains to arrive here, living comfortablely but not complacently, whole but hopeful. 

It feels like everyone in my life is growing up and getting married. Then there's me over here wearing the entire MAC Comestics counter out at night, "feeling 22," in pursuit of the perfect costume for Saturday night's Halloween roller derby ball.

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When did marriage become synonymous with growing up? Marriage is something I pray for, but when that day comes it means taking up the ultimate responsibility of the life of another and the giving up of ourselves, in favor of a greater whole, and the character and community marriage cultivates. 

Our culture makes individual freedom, autonomy, and fulfillment the very highest values, and thoughtful people know deep down that any love relationship at all means the loss of all three. 
- Tim Keller, The Meaning of Marriage

The only life I'm accountable for in this season is this little girl's, Sunday, who turned one year old on Saturday.

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Yet, I can't help but feel the pressure to grow up and get married. It feels like married is varsity and single is JV. Isn't a commitment to learning to love God and live well, while holding down a "real job" enough? Whether married or single, our mission is to love God and become ourselves, while loving each other. 

Whoever did want Him,
who believed He was who He claimed,
and would do what He said,
He made to be their true selves. 
{John 1:12, The Message} 

Singleness is not a layover between childhood and adulthood, our mission is the same regardless of which box we check. It's not a ring that moves us from youth to full-fledged adult status, it's the answering of two questions: Who am I? And why am I here?

If we don't take the time to answer these questions, misplaced time and energy results from a weak sense of self. Do we focus on answering these questions with God's guidance? Or are we too busy rushing to find a partner like a game of musical chairs, wanting desperately to find a seat and one to call our own before the music stops?

The picture of marriage is not of two needy people, unsure of their own value and purpose, finding their significance and meaning in one another's arms. [Christian marriage] assumes that each spouse has already settled the big questions of life - why they were made by God and who they are in Christ. - Tim Keller, The Meaning of Marriage

The twenty something years...I wish I'd been given a field guide the day I graduated college. I wish I'd known that these years would be this amalgam of waiting, hustling, growing, and becoming. I wish I'd known it was normal to have no idea what you want to do with your life or where you want to live it. I wish I'd known the answer to those questions is only the beginning of the journey, offering guidance and guard rails, but not necessarily redemption or renewal.

These are good days. These are quiet days. These are days when so much of life is still in front of me, but a quarter is finished, never to be relived except in scrapbook pages and late night conversations.

Before this year, I didn't know how to experience God in the stillness and the silence. I knew how to see God when things were either really great or absolutely terrible. I'm learning that God isn't just in the fire and the storm. God is in the quiet seasons in our lives and the stillness of our days, even when He is silent. 

The Lord said, "Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the I am about to pass by." Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came God's gentle whisper. {1 Kings 19:11-12, NIV}

For years, life was busy and there was fire in my eyes, then it was one natural life disaster after another, and after that came the internal war that raged inside me and a period of mourning for a life I left behind. Now there is this stillness, and a gentle whisper. It feels like I've been standing on the mountain in the presence of the Lord waiting for Him to pass by for years only to find He's been here, just not in the way I thought He'd appear, but quietly watching, nodding, and promising.

We couldn't be more sure of what we saw and heard. God's glory. God's voice. You'll do well to keep focusing on it. It's the one light you have in a dark time as you wait for daybreak and the rise of the morning star in your hearts. {2 Peter 1:19-20, The Message}

One day God will change our stories, and that change will come with new challenges and anxieties, but for now we trust the process, "laugh at the confusion, live for the moment, and know that everything happens for a reason."

Do not rush this process, because hurry keeps your heart earthbound. Tune your heart to receive these messages of abundant blessings, lay your requests before Me, then wait in joyful expectation. 
- Sarah Young, Jesus Calling

Remember watching Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, and Miranda spend the late nineties discussing the early thirty years over brunch on Sex in the City? They were way ahead of their time. On Sex and the City, we saw four women walk through life together hand in hand, reminding us that learning and loving together is what life is all about. We laughed when Carrie ran over to Miranda's in the middle of the night when Miranda thought she had a ghost, and we sat hoping we were that friend to our own Mirandas.

We watched Carrie get ready for nights out in the thirty-something apartment she made her own. We watched her write her weekly column, staring longingly out the window pondering life's questions: Are relationships the new religion? and What is it about God and fashion that go so well together?

Carrie Bradshaw's Apartment

I'll miss living in this tiny shoebox apartment (albeit a very glamorous shoebox apartment), and walking into a perfectly silent home after a long day of meetings, hearing pattering puppy paws. 

Denver Dreamhome FloorplanI'll remember nights spent running from bathroom, to closet, to bedroom getting ready for workdays, playdays, and nights out on the town. One day I'll miss these silent early mornings spent writing with candles and coffee. One day I'll miss the egocentric ease of singleness, and days when a cliff bar and a glass of red wine was a balanced dinner. 

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I'm grateful for the space and time to find myself, and to find out what I want and how it fits into God's plan for my life, especially because I was completely wrong many times when I "just knew" I got it right. 

If you're in this twenty something trifecta of work, play, and inbetweenness - and even if you're not, all of life is work, love, and ambiguity - focus on these things:

  1. Live this life you've been given with so much love that not a moment is wasted
  2. Take intelligent risks
  3. Take the time to get to know yourself and why you're here
  4. Do not emotionally or physically overtend yourself to men, women, or even a worthy cause
  5. Keep the first things first
  6. Stay in the present with hope for the future

Yearly Planning & October Living

Kate Spade Planner 2014

{Planner by Kate Spade, Notepads from Staples}

October is the month we're supposed to have it all together from an allegedly productive September. We get advanced warning, back-to-school supplies go up early August, and by late August the fall shopping season is in full swing. Yet, October sneaks up on us every year.

The holidays are a magical time of year, but the holidays also add a level of complexity to our lives. With every festive activity on our planners, we add a few more lines to our to-do lists. More and more we need to plan time to live, actively scheduling time for living, for savoring life, for allowing the holiday season to soak in imprinting its memories.

Pumpkin Patch at Anderson Farms, Colorado
{Pumpkin Patch at Anderson Farms, Colorado}

We need to set aside time to live, in order to ensure the doing does not eclipse the living. There are so many beautiful ways to spend our time this fall, from pumpkin patches to holiday decorating and entertaining.

We can't do it all and if we try we'll miss the beauty. We must choose carefully.

I find myself waiting to wake up the thinner, more fashionable, inspired and put together version of myself, when I know becoming is both a practice and a discipline. If I want to get in three workouts a week, I need to set aside that time and vigilantly and militantly protect it, not allowing conference calls or commitments to encroach. My goal is to have school and my car paid off in two years, but do I want it enough to make a debt-plan spreadsheet in excel and plan to arrive debt-free in twenty four monthly payments?

Halloween Cupake Baking at Home
{Halloween Cupcake Baking}

I love the smell of fresh paper and planning in the morning, and this morning I'm drinking carmel apple coffee planning out 2014.  I promised myself I would do this last year because I spent a beautiful day at the pumpkin patch, made DIY glitter pumpkins with my best friend, plus Halloween cupcakes, but I didn't make time to post them on this little site. We all dream big dreams, but they don't just happen. They happen through diligence and allocating time, choosing joy and passion.

In a seventeen-month planner, I'm recording everything from favorite festive activities to nail polish colors and candle scents.  OPI Nail Color: Y'all Come Back Ya Hear?

{OPI Nail Color: Y'all Come Back Ya Hear?}

I want to remember all of it, the spiritual awakenings and the coffee that was brewing when they happened. I want to ensure there is empty space for spontaneous trips to the donut shop to procure pumpkin donuts for my team. I want to remember how I spent my days and the lessons that came from each one. 

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It's true we plan to feel in control of our lives, when really God is in control. That's the dark-side of planning. On the flip-side, planning is one of the best ways to cultivate a passion for living and to create an excitement for another day spent alive. 

It's much harder to enjoy life if we're running around frantically trying to put ourselves and the pieces of our lives together. There is no way to live fully by living fast. There is no way to grow and become if we're not taking time to remember and reflect.

One of the greatest lessons I've learned the past couple years is to plan to live, to actively decide how I will spend the days of my life, both what I will do, but more importantly, how I will do it. The days of our lives are numbered. If we're are lucky, we get about 28,000. Let's not get to the end and find that we wasted days rushing instead of living, collecting things instead of memories.

Corn Maze at Anderson Farms, Erie, Colorado
{Corn Maze at Anderson Farms, Erie, Colorado}

My encouragement today is to plan to live this holiday season. Let's not miss a day, or even a moment, of the beauty and the magic of this holiday season.


Glitter Pumpkins

KeepCalmWicked

To say Halloween snuck up on me would be generous, sneak attack would be accurate. I just wrote a check and dated it for September. Priorities are realigned, time reallocated, and choas averted. My home is decorated, festive baking, and crafting has taken place!

My best friend and I set asside some quality time this Friday night to put a personal spin on the pumpkin carving tradition, and start our own tradition "pumpkin glittering." We glammed up some pumpkins, and the best part of our tradition? We won't have to say goodbye to these pretties this week. We're sure they'll make an appearance for many Halloweens to come.

Please enjoy our October project. We love it, and hope you do, too!

 {Glitter Brooms & Pumpkins}

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Step 1: Paint glue on pumpkin one vertical section at a time.

Step 2: Gently shake glitter on to the pumpkin for even glitter distribution. 

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Step 3: Spray clear spray paint to laquer pumpkins and seal the glitter.

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Step 4: Wait 24 hours for the glitter to set, and tie ribbons on the stems.

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Step 5: Place glammy pumpkins in a dreamhome or on a mantle near you!

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Brooms: We used the same process for the witch's brooms. Except instead of loose glitter, we used spray glitter since we weren't concerned with even "glitterage."

{Before}

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{After}

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SUPPLIES

Glitter & Glitter glue (Martha Stewart)
Craftable 
Pumpkins & Brooms (Hobby Lobby)
Clear Sprap Paint & Ribbon (Michael's)

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It's Friday night, there's glitter all over the room, pictures just ended up online, and I'm pretty sure these pumpkins rule. We didn't "max any credit cards or get kicked out of the bar" (winning)....we made glitter pumpkins. And next year, we're doing it all over again...get ready Halloween 2013!

TGIF,
Lisamarie